chapter IX in which education is postponed, our character encounters a Fin, and brigands make off with the loot.

so here is an interesting story:
i walk groggily into class at nine thirty in the am, only to discover class was canceled again. nothing new there. but my friend from Finland comes in and say, "i was just at the post office mailing a letter and the clerk told me that an american of a british mailed something on Nov. 11, she gave me this piece of paper and asked me to find the person." he thence produced a script of meaningless letters and words, and i, being the intended recipient, recieve this dictation with much anticipation. i think to myself "now why would they want to talk to me about a package i mailed a week ago?"

i sally forth post haste to the postal clerk, and present this agglomeration of meaningless code, along with my mailing receipt (which incidentally is hand written with a small stamp on it) in the hope of procuring some knowledge into the matter at hand. This attendant unfortunately does not know any English, so a translator must be identified among the Turkish students, and an explanations pour forth from the poor woman's mouth. as it would happen, the Christmas present package i mailed to by friend Rosie in Brooklyn will not be arriving as it has been stolen. "how does a package get stolen i inquire." the justification of this claim is that the entire mail truck has been stolen including its contents, and if it is found, the packages will be on their way to their respective destinations promptly.

for anyone i may have promised mailing any sort of present to, i will hence forth not be attempting to use the Turkish postal system. for good or evil. i apologize for any inconvenience that may ensue.

humbly yours,
-L.H.